Dear Tell All: Your letter writer Violated sounded terribly upset about her hot sexual dreams about Gov. Scott Walker ("Having Sex with Scott Walker," 5/17/2012). I guess I can understand her dismay, given that she identified herself as a liberal, a public employee and a Tom Barrett volunteer - in other words, a sworn enemy of the Republican governor. But as a political moderate myself, I would counsel her to relax and enjoy herself at bedtime.
I have a hard time seeing the downside of hot sexual dreams, no matter who the partner. (Okay, maybe not Hitler, but Walker isn't exactly Hitler.) Plus, I like the idea of a Democrat hooking up with a Republican in our insanely divided state, even if it's just an imaginary hookup. Maybe it's the first step in bridging the gap in Wisconsin's year-long civil war.
Dear Tell All: I can give a logical explanation of why your female letter writer is having sex dreams about Gov. Scott Walker, because I had the same experience a year ago when trying to sell my house in a buyer's market (took a huge loss). It is because, as a civil service employee, she is "getting screwed" by Walker. Yes, just as I was "getting screwed" on the price of my house. I had several sex dreams about every male friend I have for weeks until it finally sold.
Dear Tell All: I know exactly why Violated is having fantasies about our Republican governor. See, this broad sounds like the typical empty-headed liberal woman, someone who would never get into a relationship with a man like Scott Walker in a million years. So why is it that this bimbo absolutely despises Walker when she's awake yet makes sweet love to him while she's dreaming? I'll tell you why: It's because of the MANLY DOMINANCE that we Republicans throw around! Only by surrounding herself with liberal and feminist garbage does she manage to evade the creeping realization that she wants a real man!