The following is eyes-only for you Platinum Subscribers. To all others this special edition of Blaska's Blogge will appear as a scanning code for Ian's Pizza. Now, let's get down to business.
Funded by a generous grant from the Koch Brothers and a repentant Bunny Mellon, plans are afoot to infiltrate the Third World shantytown known as "Walkerville."
The corporate jihadist wing of the Blaska Policy Research Center and Experimental Work Farm ("Bipper-CEWF" for short) has been retained to penetrate the encampment of anarchists, liberals, progressives and Capital Times readers being erected on Mifflin and Carroll Streets on the Capitol Square. (We low-balled Blackwater.)
An elite, highly trained team of Young Republican SEALs, camouflaged in angry-fist T-shirts, is training on the putting greens and backgammon boards of the Stately Manor.
Meanwhile, the sophomore shop class at Sun Prairie High is re-purposing Blaska's mobile manor of truth. My terrestrial exploration module started life as a 19-foot Airstream Bambi recreational vehicle. On its maiden voyage, it went where no Blaska had blogged before, namely, to southern Mississippi in February. Its use in peacetime is shown in the photograph above.
Karl, Dick and Sarah wanted to transform this benign looking pod into the "Bambi of Terror." But I am launching it as the "Bambi of Hope." To blend in with Madison's more squirrelly elements, the aluminum Twinkie will be festooned with more slogans than a second-hand Prius on Willy Street. On one side we'll paint "Recall Walker" in big letters. (Underneath, we'll add the word "fondly.") On the other, a sign will declare, "THANK YOU WIS 14 (for connecting Cross Plains and Black Earth)."
No sleeping bags on hard concrete for us FitzWalkerStans. The special right-wing assault vehicle boasts a Tempur-Pedic double bed, flat screen TV (tuned to Fox News), toilet, sink, shower, fridge, stove, patio awning, multi-speaker sound system and, of course, air conditioning. This is what capitalism looks like! Our lending library will stock volumes from Waugh, Hayek, Friedman, Buckley, and Tommy G.
We will keep the cocktail mixer humming while the Squire does his best Thurston Howell III impression. We'll eat well, too.
"Pardon me, young hirsute fellow," I'll ask a neighbor. "Have you any Grey Poupon for my Johnsonville sausages?" Yes, we'll do outreach and a little low-key proselytizing. ("Have you considered exchange-traded funds, young hophead?")
Promptly at 5 o'clock in the morning, the Bambi will light up like a launch at Cape Canaveral. Its sound system will blast out Reveille, followed by Kate Smith bellowing God Bless America and some rousing John Philip Sousa and Ride of the Valkyries. Smells like victory!
The Big Boys under the dome will follow our activities in real time in the situation room; I envision a famous photograph in which Lt. Gov. Rebecca Kleefisch covers her mouth in anxiety, followed by a prime time televised announcement that the mission has been accomplished.
We hope to return to home port with a Lefty specimen in tow for research at the Bipper-CEWF; I have my eyes on a certain fellow on a Segway. ("Need an oil change, big boy? Check the tires?") Of course, the Bambi of Terror -- I mean, HOPE -- will be rigged with more hidden recording devices than Tricky Dick's Oval Office. Enough to keep DOJ's crime lab busy for months.
Stop by if you're in the neighborhood. The daiquiris will be well frozen!
The worm has turned
The anti-Walker, pro-government union protests peaked sometime in early March, when the likes of Michael Moore and Jesse Jackson and other opportunists began bleeding the life out of the movement. Heavy-handed union boycott tactics, fake doctors excuses, incessant drumming, the illegal occupation of the Capitol, legislators hectored, schools closed, and opposing voices shouted down all served to transform "this is what democracy looks like" into a pretty fair impression of Danton and Robespierre.
Last week we had the spectacle of young wastrels disrupting lawful Joint Finance Committee sessions of our elected legislature. Many on the Left acknowledge the damage.
Illusory Tenant Tom Foley addressed himself To the self-styled Wisconsin anarchists of the JFC.
Last night a meeting of the Wisconsin legislature's Joint Finance Committee was repeatedly and prolongedly disrupted by so-called "protesters." Naturally, the wing-nut media, which dominates the Milwaukee area, at least, are having a field day with your obstreperous behavior this morning. ... you make us appear as hypocrites by on the one hand challenging the regime's adherence to procedure and on the other hand making a complete and utter mockery of procedure. In other words, you're not only not helping, you're aggressively hindering.
So please stop it. Now.
Over on TheDailyPage, activist Jenni Dye warns that disruption of Joint Finance Committee hurts the union protest movement.
Every time a protester shouts down Joint Finance, he or she is giving the four recalled Republican senators on the committee -- Luther Olsen, Sheila Harsdorf, Alberta Darling, and Randy Hopper -- a chance to be seen as sympathetic figures.
But Forward Lookout's resident Prog Dane hothead, Kyle Szarzynski, whines it's so unfair, so "divisive," this criticism.
I've been very disappointed in the amount of negative commentary this action has received on Facebook and other places from self-described opponents of the Walker cuts. These protesters are wasting time, doing more harm than good, violating the democratic process, etc I've read it all at this point. Even more disturbing were the comments from the Democrats on the JFC:
Sen. Bob Jauch (D-Poplar): "I'm on your side. I'm asking you to consider that you could be doing more harm than good."
Sen. Lena Taylor (D-Milwaukee): "With all due respect, you don't speak for us…the issue is whether this room is going to be filled with you or without you."
Kyle has "read it all?" Doubtful. Meanwhile, not a discouraging word from The Capital Times. Maybe Comrade John has swallowed his bullhorn.
Organizers of the shantytown have already promised to violate the rules of their permit application. We'll see what depredations they commit.
