Krystal Pence
Brian H. chats with Melanie C. during a speed dating event at Vi
Brian H. chats with Melanie C. during a speed dating event at Vintage Brewing in January.
At Tricky Foods, a charcuterie and wine bar in the Bay Creek neighborhood, men and women nervously shuffle around the room, drinks in hand, as they engage in a series of rapid-fire conversations, hopeful that at least one meeting could turn into something more.
This is speed dating, a matchup strategy that first became popular in the 1990s. Recently, it’s made a quiet resurgence. For some Madison singles, it’s a reprieve from the monotony and lack of success they’ve had with online dating and trying to meet other singles in “the wild,” also known as everyday life.
Typically, participants talk with each other for three to five minutes before the round ends, and then they move on to a new person. For most, awkwardness and laughter appear to blend with genuine curiosity about who their temporary partner is. By the end of the night, all participants will have met each other.
They then let organizers know who they would be interested in seeing again, and if the person they’re interested in indicates a similar interest, it’s a match! Organizers reveal match contact information, and it’s up to the pair to make the next move.
For some attendees, speed dating can be low-pressure entertainment; for others, it’s a way to form a more meaningful attachment. Ken Fager, 42, has attended several speed dating events in Madison. He says it’s been a refreshing change from the dating apps, where it can take him up to six months to match and converse with someone.
Speed dating is “the way to keep those muscles active and actually talk to a physical human being face-to-face,” he says. “I think there's definitely value in doing that with some regularity.”
Nate Wegehaupt, 30, went to a speed dating event in the summer of 2024 at The Rigby. At the time, he had gotten out of a long-term relationship, and meeting other single people through dating apps or organically was not working.
“I was happy that there was something in-person that was available,” he says. “I had tried to do other ways of meeting people in-person, like going to bars. I got some coaching from one of my female friends about how to approach women at a bar and not come off as a creep, and yeah, that did not work.”
Vintage Brewing Company, Tricky Foods and The Rigby are three Madison businesses that host speed dating events.
“To get to help somebody meet their soulmate or their really important partner, it's an honor to be involved,” says Linda deLucca, owner of Pre-Dating, which organizes Vintage Brewing Company’s monthly speed dating at the restaurant’s Whitney Way location. Pre-Dating organizes speed dating events in more than 90 cities and has been holding singles events in Madison since 2006.
For Rory Nienajadlo, director of operations for Vintage, Pre-Dating’s events have been a good way to bring in more patrons. Pre-Dating rents the brewery’s event space and manages all the promotion, which makes it an easy lift on the restaurant’s end.
When Tricky Foods hosted its first speed dating night in spring 2024, the response was enthusiastic, says Kelsey Hornung, its events and marketing coordinator. However, one challenge has been recruiting male participants, she says.
“We're trying to figure out the format, because 11,000 out of our 12,000 Instagram followers are female and they sign up right away,” she says. “It's hard with the guys because we don't have that following.”
The Rigby has hosted speed dating events on and off for a few years, including in partnership with Pre-Dating. However, the venue has recently revamped its speed dating with a focus on inclusivity. Currently, The Rigby is the only venue to host speed dating events specifically for Madison’s LGBTQ+ community, including recent separate lesbian and gay speed dating nights.
“We've had a really positive response since there really is no other thing like it in Madison,” says Avery Potter, social media and marketing intern for The Rigby.
While there have been some success stories of long-term couples that met via a Madison speed dating event, it’s more common for attendees to walk away with a fun story, or even a new friend.
“We always say in our descriptions that no matter what happens, you're going to have fun, you're going to meet new people,” Hornung says. “You might not meet the love of your life.”
As for Ken Fager, he hasn’t found love yet, but he hasn’t given up and encourages others to do the same. He remains open to attending local speed dating events.
“As the hopeless romantic that I am, I like to believe that to just keep trying is going to be the only way to figure this out. It's not going to happen overnight,” he says. “ I hope that's the case for everyone else that goes to these.”
Full speed ahead
Upcoming speed dating nights
• The Rigby’s Valentine’s Sapphic Speed Dating: Feb. 15, 1:30 p.m. check-in, 2 p.m. start, $10 [NOTE TIME AND DAY CHANGE]
• Pre-Dating’s Singles Lock and Key Party at Seminole Tap: Feb. 12, 6 p.m.
• Pre-Dating’s Monthly Speed Dating Event at Vintage Brewing-west: March 3, 6 and 8 p.m.
[editor's note: this article has been changed to reflect the time and date of the speed dating at The Rigby]
