Dear Tell All: Why do so many single women in Madison have cats? I’m allergic to the horrid little monsters, which makes dating almost impossible. It doesn’t matter if I’m at a woman’s house, where the cat dander is everywhere; or she’s at my house, where the cat dander is all over her clothes and her hair. My eyes itch, my nose runs, and I sneeze and wheeze. A while back I made a strict rule for myself: no more dating anyone who owns a cat.
I stuck to my rule until early this year, when I met a woman I’ll call Maggie. She’s tall, gorgeous, and kind, with an impressive career. She seemed out of my league but, to my surprise, flirted with me at a party. One thing led to another, and a week later we went out to dinner together. At the end of the night, she invited me back to her house and…well, you see where this is going. She had not one, not two, but three cats crawling all over her couches.
I was horrified, as you can imagine. But I wasn’t about to adhere to my rule — not with a dream date beckoning me toward one of those couches.
I had the best sex of my life that night. But, man, did I pay for it the next day. I could barely breathe and was itching like crazy. Still, I quickly called Maggie again to try to keep the momentum going. For the first time in my life, a cat owner seemed worth the trouble.
So far, I’ve managed to keep my cat hatred, not to mention my allergies, a secret from her. Since we see each other only once a week at most, I’ve always recovered from my allergic reaction by the next date. But I’m worried that, as we get closer, either I won’t be able to stand it anymore, or she won’t be able to stand me — a sniffling, sneezing wreck of a boyfriend. Is there any hope for this relationship?
Afflicted
Dear Afflicted: Here is my medical advice: Take an antihistamine before each date. Wash your hands frequently and don’t touch your face. Consider allergy shots.
Here is my romantic advice: Stop keeping your affliction a secret, especially now that you and Maggie are getting more serious. If she’s as kind as you say, she’ll be sympathetic about your condition and will work with you toward a solution.
If she’s not willing to do that, I’d suggest breaking up with her immediately. It would mean she’s not capable of a mutually caring relationship — and you know better than most that those are nothing to sneeze at.
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