Dear Tell All: I have a decent friendship with a guy who lives two houses down from me on the east side. We’re not the closest friends in the world, but we occasionally go out for a drink or a Badgers game. I’m in higher education and he’s a blue-collar worker without a college degree, but the difference in our backgrounds never seemed like an obstacle. We’re just two guys who usually agree about politics, sports, movies and lots of other things.
But something just happened that makes my skin crawl. My neighbor and his wife just had a baby and gave her the stupidest name imaginable. I don’t want to say what it is, in case he reads this, or in case it brings unwanted attention to the girl. So let’s just say he named her “Unique.”
How can I respect a guy who’d do such a thing to his daughter? People will be snickering at her name for the rest of her life.
Is it snobby to care about such a thing? To me, people who try so hard for a one-of-a-kind baby name expose themselves as immodest and kind of dumb.
I’ve got a young son, and he has a normal name that comes from the King James Bible. If he grows up to be unique, it will be because of his achievements and not because of some ridiculously extravagant name.
Joe
Dear Joe: Your son has a normal name from the King James Bible? Let me guess: Shammuah? Kenaniah? Othniel? I get the impression you haven’t read the Good Book lately, so let me remind you that it contains hundreds of monikers more extravagant than “Unique.”
You act as if there’s a single standard of good taste for naming children. And you suggest that you know what it is, while your blue-collar neighbor is hopelessly gauche. Yes, Joe, that’s pretty much the definition of “snobby.”
Naming standards vary from place to place and from era to era. “Thomas” and “Trisha” sound normal to your ears only because you’re used to them. If you lived in the 19th century, “Tecumseh” and “Temperance” would sound normal.
If you haven’t noticed, naming standards are changing in our own era. The recently made-up word “Nevaeh,” for example, is among the 100 most popular names for girls, ahead of recent favorites like “Eleanor” and “Katherine.” That means your neighbor is in the mainstream, Joe, while you’re behind the curve.
Since you love the King James era so much, I’ll close with a quote from Shakespeare that I hope will change your attitude: “What's in a name? That which we call a rose/By any other name would smell as sweet.”
Do you have a question about life or love in Madison?
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