Dear Tell All: I am ugly and hate myself. Ever since I was little, people have scorned me because of my looks. While other guys could easily feel like they were part of a group, I’ve been an eternal outsider. While other guys got girlfriends, I’ve been alone.
I do have a small number of friends, and I cherish them. I’d to anything for them, and I think they know that. However, sometimes I feel like even they pity me for my frightful face.
What are my options? Should I consider plastic surgery? I think I deserve to be happy, like everyone else, but the odds are stacked against someone who looks the way I do.
Ugly Benny
Dear Benny: You need a reality check, my dear, and you’ve come to the right place. For starters, I will not refer to you as “Ugly Benny,” and I forbid you to refer to yourself that way from now on. “Ugly” is just a state of mind. A surgical adjustment will do you no good, but an attitudinal adjustment could work wonders.
By obsessing on your looks, you’ve fallen into one of America’s most dangerous traps. It’s true that our shallowest citizens place inordinate value on outward appearance, but why give them so much power over you? I’m here to tell you that Kardashian Nation is not a sustainable place to live.
I’m sure you know that, even if you did conform to current standards of physical beauty, it would be a temporary affair. The pretty people will age, just like the rest of us. So why not focus on more enduring human qualities, which are what truly determine beauty? Reading between the lines, I’m guessing that you have them in abundance, including kindness and loyalty. Unlike physical qualities, which are the luck of the draw, your qualities require strength of character.
Give yourself credit for that. From now on you shall be known as Beautiful Benny.
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