Dear Tell All: I'm a romantic by nature, and I'd planned an extravagant Valentine's Day for my boyfriend last weekend. I made his favorite meal at my apartment and bought him his favorite chocolate and wine. Afterwards, I requested that we go to the place where we met two years ago, the Cardinal Bar. I thought a lavish evening of food, drink and dancing could help recharge our relationship, which has been up and down in recent months.
My boyfriend is more of a hard-boiled personality. He can be sweet when he wants to be, but he can also be thoughtless, and he's usually not one to express his feelings. I hoped that Valentine's Day might be an occasion for him to open up and show me that he really cares.
So we ate dinner, danced and, I thought, had a good time. But on the way back to my place he blurted out that he didn't think our relationship was going anywhere. We argued for about 10 minutes in his car, and I finally headed into my apartment alone. He made no attempt to stop me, nor has he called me since.
I've had trouble getting off the couch since then, and I have no interest in jumping back into the dating pool anytime soon. Even for me, it's hard to believe in romance after experiencing my worst Valentine's Day ever.
Dear Bereft: I have to disagree. I think you just had your best Valentine's Day ever. You'll remember it as the day you got rid of that jerk and got on with your life.
I always remind people that there's nothing inherently magical about Valentine's Day. It can be a great day or a terrible day, just like any other. More often than not it's disappointing because we put such weirdly high expectations on February 14. This year, you were a victim of those high expectations.
But now that the scent of wine and chocolate has faded, think about the evening realistically. You yourself admit that the relationship had problems. You're aware that your boyfriend had serious faults. By choosing that moment to break up with you, right in the middle of your beautifully planned evening, he proved once and for all that he isn't the right guy for you.
But I know a place where you might just find the right guy: the Cardinal Bar. Head back on a tango night or salsa night and meet someone else -- someone who's more in sync with your romantic nature. If you get up off the couch and put some effort into finding your true soul mate, I predict you'll have the Valentine's Day of your dreams in 2016.
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