Dear Tell All: I’m a movie buff who usually sees several films a week, either streaming or in theaters. But I’m more than just a fan. I consider myself an expert with high standards for acting, scripts, direction and cinematography. Many of my friends don’t like going to movies with me because I often criticize the ones they think are great. But I’m proud of having better taste than the masses.
I’ve had girlfriends with a similar interest in indie films, art cinema and visionary directors, and we enjoyed going to the UW Cinematheque together. But my current girlfriend doesn’t fall into that camp. She loves the same cliched, sentimental blockbusters everyone else loves. And she hates the artistically ambitious films I show her.
Well, I assume she hates them. She’s always polite, insisting that she found Isle of Dogs, The Ballad of Buster Scruggs and other 2018 masterpieces “interesting.” But I can tell she wasn’t really responding to them — not the way she did to A Star Is Born, Bohemian Rhapsody and other cookie-cutter crap.
We’re invited to an Oscar party, and I’m worried about a disaster of an evening. I’m sure my girlfriend will be rooting for Green Book and other movies I despise as I sink deeper into despair. How can I keep her from ruining the experience for me?
Thumbs Down
Dear Thumbs Down: I’m less worried about your girlfriend ruining the experience for you than I am about you ruining the experience for her — and everyone else at the party.
You call yourself an expert on cinema, but you don’t seem to know a whole lot about people. Are you really proud that none of your friends likes going to movies with you? Are you really scornful of your girlfriend’s politeness about the films you subject her to? You should be grateful for her generosity, and you should be grateful that your long-suffering friends even invited you to their Oscar party.
To prepare for the party, Thumbs Down, I’d suggest watching a 2018 blockbuster you surely hated, Dr. Seuss’ The Grinch. It will provide a lesson on the dangers of having a heart that’s two sizes too small.
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