Dear Tell All: My wife and I usually aren't superstitious, but we're starting to think that 2011 has it in for us.
The alarm on my iPhone didn't work on the Monday after New Year's, so we both woke up late. In the scramble to get to work, my wife somehow ended up wearing one black shoe and one brown shoe. Of course she didn't notice until she was walking into her office. So she had to make her first critical decision of the year: Could she successfully hide one foot for 10 solid hours, or should she race home and grab the other shoe? She chose to drive home, which made her even later.
At the end of my workday, I casually walked to my car - a Mini Cooper - and noticed that the windows were a little icy. So I unlocked the door, grabbed the scraper and casually tossed the keys on the driver's seat. A tiny voice in my head wondered if that was a bad idea, but really, what's the car going to do, lock itself? Well yeah, turns out it does. After a few minutes of scraping, I was almost done when I heard the familiar "ka-chunk" of the locks closing. All doors: completely locked . . . keys staring at me from the front seat.
The situation got even more depressing the more I thought about it: My house keys were on the same ring! So even if I got a ride home to get my spare car key, I couldn't get into the house. I ended up calling my wife, who had to go home, dig around for my spare key and come pick me up. It added a couple of hours to our already stressful day.
Anyway, we're both a little nervous about the way the new year has started. We're afraid to leave the house.
Timid Tim
Dear Timid Tim: I think the universe is sending you a simple but important message: Don't go to work. It's far too dangerous.
Now that you mention it, things have been a little odd lately: birds falling from the sky; emails disappearing from Hotmail; Michele Bachmann being appointed to a House intelligence committee. It's eerie. These may not be the End Times, but I think they're definitely the end of normal times.